Is There Anything Wrong With Making Eye Contact?

By Anita Degbe

In some countries (like Benin, West Africa) making eye contact - especially with people of higher status (an elder, boss, etc…) - is seen as a sign of great disrespect and provocation. While talking to an elder, you have to look down and hang your head to prove that you respect him or her. This tradition originated from the time of kingdoms when the servant or slave didn’t have the right to look at the king, queen and any noble or blueblood person directly in the eyes while talking to and obeying them. Not making an eye contact is a big sign of respect, love, obedience and worship that has been kept by a lot of cultures all around the world.

When raising children, a lot of parents teach them this rule and can severely punish them if they fail to do it. A child who looks directly into someone’s eyes brings shame for his family because he is seen as a poorly educated child that comes from an unworthy family.

In the U.S, as well as counties in Europe, eye contact is seen as a sign of interest and focus during a conversation. Looking directly into someone’s eyes while having a conversation is a must. It proves that you are trustworthy, respectful and self-confident.

Not making eye contact can communicate that you are distracted, uninterested and disrespectful. It can put you at a disadvantage, especially during job interviews or when you want to get something important from someone. For example people usually say “look me in the eyes when you talk to me”.

Everybody and every country follows its own rules. Everybody can make eye contact. It is just the way you look at that person, the way you act, or may be the topic of the conversation that really defines the nature of your eye contact.

Looking at someone respectfully while talking to them is usually a big sign of consideration and interest.

#eyecontact #culture #differences #makingeyecontact